The
time after you give birth is a joyous and emotional time. After nine
long months of pregnancy, you will greet the arrival of your baby with
great anticipation. It may seem impossible that anything could make you
wish for those days when you were still pregnant. Unfortunately, the
time after delivery often marks a drastic change in their sexual desire.
While most women—and men—expect changes in their sex life immediately
after the birth of a child, as the weeks turn into months it is normal
for both partners to wonder when, and if, things will ever return to
normal.
Step 1
Talk to your
doctor. Never assume that a loss of libido is all in your head. Talk to
your doctor about how your libido has changed since you gave birth. Your
health care provider can help rule out physical problems as well as
reassure you that lower libido is normal after birth.
Step 2
Deal with
fatigue. Nap during the day or ask your partner to take over some of the
nighttime feedings, so you can get enough rest. It is impossible to
look forward to sex when you are sleep deprived.
Step 3
Remove the
pressure. Talk honestly with your spouse about your lack of sex drive.
Remember, he is a new parent also, and is likely experiencing many
conflicting emotions as well. Reassuring your spouse that you find him
attractive and are working on increasing your sex drive can help ease
the pressure on both of you.
Step 4
Prepare for sex.
Before hitting the sheets, take the time for a warm bath, a glass of
wine or anything else that will help you relax and get you in the mood.
This type of prep work may seem like a waste of time, but it is
important to help your body transition from "mommy mode" to wife and
lover.
Step 5
Use a lubricant.
It is hard to look forward to something that is painful. Hormonal
changes after birth can make intercourse uncomfortable. Adding
lubrication can ease the discomfort and make sex more enjoyable.
Step 6
Just do it. Sex
drive is complicated, and sometimes, if you don't use it, you lose it.
You may need to go ahead and have sex sometimes, even when you're not in
the mood. No one expects you to participate in something you don't want
to do, but sometimes it takes a little nudge to get the libido back
into gear. Once you get over the hurdle of not being in the mood, you
may just find that you are enjoying yourself.
Comments
Post a Comment